The moment I discovered Mark Tuitert’s book, Drive: Train Je Stoïcijnse Mindset (Drive: Train Your Stoic Mindset), was the moment I was introduced to this ancient philosophy called Stoicism. And as someone who writes almost obsessively, I immediately felt at home with this philosophy. In my previous post, The (Stoic) Philosophy of Writing, I demonstrated how writing is closely linked with Stoicism.
But of course, Stoicism is more than being able to assess your thoughts and life through writing alone. It also differs significantly from how we use the word stoic (with a lowercase s) today. In a nutshell, the philosophy of Stoicism is about remaining calm and maintaining perspective in times of setbacks, adversity, and chaos by focusing your time and energy on the things that lie within your sphere of control.
Thanks to Mark Tuitert’s book, this way of thinking and living was introduced to me. This philosophy has helped me greatly in regulating stress and anxiety, and in reshaping how I relate to setbacks.
The author
In many ways, Mark Tuitert—a name I had hitherto never heard—introduced me to the philosophy of Stoicism. Accidentally stumbling upon his book in my favourite bookstore that day was a watershed moment for me. From then on, I not only began searching for and reading more books about Stoicism, but also started applying its teachings to my own, rather mundane, daily life.
But who is Mark Tuitert anyway? That was exactly the question that crossed my mind when the catchy title of his book caught my eye.
Mark Tuitert is an Olympic medallist in speed skating. He won the gold medal during the 2010 Winter Olympics in Vancouver, Canada. He is, therefore, a big deal.
However, before Tuitert became a gold medallist, he was also confronted with disappointment, failure, and setbacks. He competed in the 2002 Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City but lost. He lost again when he competed in the 2006 Winter Olympics in Turin.
The setbacks and failures he endured proved to be blessings in disguise, because in his search for answers to the question “Where did it go wrong?”, he discovered the philosophy of Stoicism. This philosophy changed his mindset—to say the least.
Did Stoic philosophy make him a winner? Perhaps not entirely. But focusing on winning is absolutely not the point of Stoicism. Rather, the focus should be directed toward the things in life that you can control. For instance, one cannot control the outcome of a game, but one can control one’s performance.
Stoicism: main points
To discuss the teachings and ideas of Stoic philosophy in great detail would be too ambitious for the limited space of a blog post such as this. That is not the objective of this text. To properly examine this ancient philosophy inherited from the Hellenistic period would require the space of an entire book—something Mark Tuitert and other modern Stoics have already done.
For this reason, I will only touch upon those tenets of Stoicism that are particularly applicable and useful in my own personal life.
Let go of the things you cannot control
The philosophy of Stoicism teaches us to discern the difference between the events and encounters in our lives over which we have control and those over which we do not. Stoicism invites us to train ourselves to focus on the former and to let go of the latter. Based on my own personal experience—especially given my tendency to want to control things—this is far easier said than done.
Distinguishing what you can control from what you cannot is one thing; letting go of and accepting the latter is another matter entirely. It requires constant training and reminding yourself that there is little sense in spending energy on things you cannot control in the first place.
Outside factors cannot hurt you, but how you relate to them can
The second teaching of Stoicism that is particularly relevant in my day-to-day life concerns how we relate to our experiences. External forces cannot hurt us in themselves, but the way we relate to them certainly can.
For instance, not passing an important exam in itself cannot hurt you. But the way you approach this event can. If you see it purely as a failure, then it will certainly hurt. But if you see it as feedback and part of a learning curve, it becomes a valuable opportunity—one that enriches you. In this way, failing an exam becomes less hurtful.
Of course, you will still feel disappointed. Stoicism is not about negating human emotions, but about being able to pick yourself up and continue marching on despite them.
Setbacks are learning curves
The third Stoic practice I want to mention is closely related to the second: changing the way we relate to setbacks and failures. For the Stoics, setbacks are not failures, but opportunities that can ultimately lead to success.
We can learn a great deal from our setbacks, because they provide us with information on how to do better next time. When we fail, it means we have tried—and our failed attempts have certainly taught us many things.
Our failures are just as important as our successes. And success should not be our primary focus in the first place, which brings us back to the first point: the dichotomy of control. Whether we fail or succeed does not lie entirely within our direct control. Our performance, however, does.

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